We're getting a little preview of how world leaders will respond to Donald Trump when Americans elect him as president: a resounding, "Ugh, no."
London's new mayor Sadiq Khan recently expressed concern that he might not be able to visit the United States if Trump's Muslim ban actually comes to pass. As you'll recall, "a complete and total shutdown of Muslims entering the US" is how Donald described his plan.
Well, it turns out that "complete and total" doesn't actually mean what you think it means. Upon hearing about Khan's concerns, Trump told the NY Times, “There will always be exceptions," and that the mayor might be welcome to enter the country. Maybe. "If he does a great job."
For some strange reason, Khan isn't enthusiastic about this terribly generous offer. It's almost as if he sees the potential for abuse in a system whereby certain classes of people are singled out for unequal legal protections, with exceptions offered under unspecified criteria.
"This isn’t just about me— it’s about my friends, my family and everyone who comes from a background similar to mine, anywhere in the world,” Khan said in a response to Trump's offer of an "exception."
(Khan previously served in Parliament for an area of London known as "Tooting," which has led to such fabulous sentences as "He was the Member of Parliament for Tooting,""all Tooting residents are safe," and "I've stepped down as MP for Tooting.")
Trump still stands by the ban, or maybe he doesn't whatever, even he doesn't seem to know. "I’m doing the right thing when I do this. And whether it’s Muslim or whether it’s something else, I mean, I have to do the right thing," he said.
But he can't unsqueeze that toothpaste-tube of hate, and has now put America in the position of the most unpopular kid in class who sends out invitations to his birthday only to receive a litany of excuses for why nobody wants to attend. Khan is only the first to send his regrets, or lack thereof, but he's unlikely to be the last. Trump will probably also have difficulty reaching out to Sheikh Hasina, Prime Minister of Bangladesh, or Kosovo President Atifete Jahjaga, or Mauritius President Ameenah Gurib-Fakim. All are Muslim.
And they may be the lucky ones, since the Muslim ban would provide them with the perfect excuse for shunning the US. It's like how you were relieved to be able to skip your irritating coworker's birthday party because she has cats and you're allergic. Yes, just like that, except, you know, on the scale of religious hate crimes.
Muslim leaders have a convenient "nope" to avoid dealing with Trump/America, but what of poor David Cameron, who called Trump's proposals "divisive, stupid and wrong"? What excuse will he reach for to avoid the United States for the next four years? Or German Foreign Minister Frank-Walter Steinmeier, who delicately said that Trump is "not completely free of contradictions"?
German Vice Chancellor Sigma Gabriel called him"a threat to peace and social cohesion," and Saudi Prince Alwaleed bin Talal bin Abdulaziz al-Saud wrote, "You are a disgrace not only to the GOP but to all America." Rafael Correa, President of Ecuador, said of Trump, "his discourse is so dumb, so basic."
International travel was bad enough under George W. Bush, when you had to pretend you were Canadian. At least then, international leaders would at least give our head of state the time of day, even when he touched them inappropriately.
When we elect Donald Trump, get ready for the entire world to make the same face as Angela Merkel, tensing and throwing up its fists in the hopes that our country will simply go away and leave them alone. I can't say I blame them.